All My Love
by Krystyne
Summary: I am borrowing Charlaine Harris' characters, and have total respect for her and her work. This is just a little idea of what could happen after book 9 for Bill and Sookie. It's probably a one parter. Contains smut.


I'm not sure how good this one is. I usually write about Eric, but I really love Bill too. And I really do not know which way Charlaine will go with book 10, but I had this as an idea of what _could_ be. It turned out to be more difficult to write about Bill and Sookie than I expected. I hope you all like it. If you do, I will probably continue it, but I'm not sure if it's good enough to continue. Anyway, thanks for giving this a look.

**ALL MY LOVE**

_My Dearest Sookie, _

_Please know that I am so sorry for having hurt you. I know my betrayal may seem unforgivable, but as I have told you, I was compelled to answer the summons of my maker. My staying with her was my sin, one I may never forgive myself for. I turned my back on you, but I never stopped loving you._

_Yes, my original orders when returning to Bon Temps were to acquire your services for the Queen, but you have to know that it was so much more to me. After I met you, and saw for myself what an extraordinary creature you are, once I felt all the love you had to give, it was never about my orders. It was only about you, and protecting you. I have lived for over 150 years, but my feelings for you have renewed me. You have moved me, changed me, forever._

_I let my work come between us. I neglected you for my work and that is unpardonable. I have learned from my mistake and I would never put anything above you again, my love, my life._

_I have done everything in my power to protect you since the day we met. I would do anything to keep you safe, even now. I would give up my own existence if it would keep you safe. I would burn for you, bleed for you, die a final death for you. You are my world, and I love you. _

_I know that Eric thinks of you as his. I know that you two are bonded and you have strong feelings for him. But you were mine first, and if you love me at all, please think about what we were to each other, what we could be again. All you need do is say the word._

_But, you know all of this. I suppose this letter serves as my last hope, my last try at winning you back. You know where to find me and you need only to call. My life is nothing without you._

_All My Love,_

_Bill_

Sookie read the words for the tenth time and finally the tears had stopped. Did she love Bill? What about Eric? Her confusion threatened to drive her crazy. How could she ever trust how she felt about either of them?

Bill had lied to her, and betrayed her in the worst kind of way. He took her heart; he took her virginity, all the while knowing that it was just part of his mission for the Queen. Had he really loved her that first time…or did it happen later, was he even telling the truth about any of it?

And Eric, they had exchanged blood so many times, how could she know if what she was feeling was real at all, or just some parody of Eric's emotions, or what he wanted her to feel. And Eric had never told her he loved her. He didn't even bother to lie about it.

With Bill, she could keep the life she was accustomed to. Bill could be her boyfriend at night, and the rest of the time, she could work for Sam and see Jason and the few friends she had.

With Eric, she would need to move to Shreveport. If he decided he wanted her for real, he would hardly allow her to live that far from him. And that was another thing, he had never said he wanted to be her boyfriend, he had only said that she was his. Like she was his possession, he would want her at his beck and call. All and all, Eric was much more demanding of her time and energy. But was he worth it?

She would never spend an hour of daylight with either of them. She would never go to church on Sunday, or wake up on Christmas morning with either of them. She would not be able to bring them to family functions, not that she had much family, but even barbeques and picnics were never going to happen with these men. Worst of all, she would never be able to raise a family with either of them.

Sookie adored the sun. She would never feel the heat of the sun's rays on her body, while holding the hand of her lover. Unless she wanted to hold on to a pile of ashes, she was never going to the beach with Eric or Bill.

The sex with Bill had been amazing, exciting, loving, and what felt like a true connection. Was it the same for him, or was she reading into it because she had loved him so very much? Sex with Eric was unpredictable, always thrilling and spontaneous, and oh so satisfying. Eric was insatiable, impossibly hot, and he made her feel like a real woman. He seemed to worship every inch of her body, but Bill did that too. Both men made her feel like the most special person in the world, when they were with her. The rest of the time, they seemed to be all business.

Her head was starting to ache.

Bill had left this letter for her several nights earlier. She knew he would be waiting for her each night when he awoke. She wondered just how long he would wait for a response.

Sookie decided it was rude if not downright mean for her to wait any longer to respond. She changed out of her Merlotte's uniform, into a blue sundress and matching flip flops, and started on her way through the cemetery to Bills' place.

This cemetery held many memories for her. Her Gran was buried near here. Renee had attacked and nearly killed her in another part of the cemetery. And Bill had crawled out of the mud and…well made love wasn't the right word. Bill had fucked her silly in this cemetery.

As she neared the house, she could see the lights were lit. Bill was at home. She didn't have to knock; he knew she was there long before she got to the door.

"Sookie." Bill whispered in the cool dark voice that always gave her shivers

They were the good kind of shivers, but he didn't need to know that. "Bill, I just wanted to talk to you…well…about your letter."

"Please come in and sit down."

Sookie sat on the familiar sofa in the dimly lit room. She had missed spending time here. It was like an antebellum slice of life. A time warp had hit his home, and she saw no evidence of Bill's desire to change a thing.

"Bill I can't give you any answers right now. Not anything you want to hear anyway."

Bill's face had never looked hopeful, but somehow it looked even more dejected than it had when she arrived. He knew he would not be able to win her back with a letter, but he hoped to put a crack in that wall she had built between them. Those words on a paper could hardly express the depth of his feeling for her. She had changed him so drastically, and without her, he had no will to go on.

"I know that you have made love with Eric and shared his blood."

"Yes." Sookie replied without apology.

"I know you have certain feelings for him, but…" Bill paused, unable to express himself fully.

Sookie waited for him to continue. She could see he was struggling. Part of her wanted to reach out and hug him, cradle his head in her arms, but part of her said it was over.

"Sookie, if you love him, I won't, well I can't, stand in your way. But you were mine first; do you remember what that felt like? Because for me, it was everything. You have changed me forever, and I will always love you for the rest of eternity. Do you know this, can you feel it?"

Sookie was aghast. "I…Bill, you left me, you chose someone else!"

Bill's brow furrowed. "That was the worst decision of my life. I am paying for it. Every day that you are away from me, I am paying. I will never forgive myself. Will you ever be able to forgive me?"

"I think I have, Bill."

Bill walked toward her as he spoke. "Sookie, I love you so. I miss you. I miss your face, your smile, the feel of your hair as it runs through my fingers, the smell of your sunlit skin, the sound of your voice when you body is writhing on fire beneath me. The way you used to run into my arms when you first saw me each evening. The light in your eyes when you said you loved me. All those things, I can't go on any longer, living without them.

Sookie's heart was breaking. She could feel all the love radiating from him. She knew how hard it was for Bill to have said all those things, knowing she had been with Eric. She knew his male pride, and she knew he was humbling himself to plead for her. She realized at that moment that she shared his feelings. In that instant her heart let go of all the hurt of his betrayals with Lorena and the Queen. She could see the first man she had ever fallen in love with standing before her, begging her to love him.

Sookie stood up, not sure if she was going to say something, or try to leave. She didn't want to leave, but she was afraid. What if it didn't work out this time? What if Bill left her again? She would have no one. Eric would never take her back if she recommitted herself to Bill. But Eric had never made her any promises. There weren't any guarantees for anyone. Life wasn't like that.

"Bill, I…"

Bill took another step closer, daring to hope that she may want him again. "Sookie, please, tell me what you are feeling."

Sookie looked into Bill's dark eyes, and she could see all the hope in them, all the love he felt for her. She had not intended to take him back tonight. She had not expected to make any kind of decision, but the way he looked at her, as if no other woman could compare, she wanted him.

She reached up to touch his face, and pressed her lips to his, probing with her tongue, wanting to feel the familiar thrust of his tongue as his danced with hers. He scooped her into his arms as if she weighed nothing, and kissed her passionately. Sookie tore at the buttons on his shirt, fumbling and ripping when she couldn't open them fast enough. Soon she had worked his shirt over his strong squared shoulders, and exposed his muscular chest. No one was more masculine than Bill, and her heart was racing being so near to him.

Bill held her tighter, as she wrapped her legs around him and whispered. "I love you."

Bill held her tightly as he climbed the stairs. He carried Sookie into the bedroom, not caring that she hadn't said anything. He still didn't know if she could love him again, but he just wanted her. Nothing else mattered.

Sookie was not sure about many things at that moment, but she knew that she wanted to get closer to him….she needed to feel his skin on hers. She reached for the hem of her shirt and pulled it over her head dropping it on the floor, then she worked on the button of Bill's jeans. He had bra off and her pants open and around her ankles long before she could even touch his jeans.

Sookie giggled. "Help with this."

Bill gave her a half smile and removed his own pants. He sat on the edge of the bed and pulled Sookie onto his lap. Without a single word, she lifted herself and positioned Bill's erection at her opening before plunging onto it.

The feeling sent chills through her, as her body flooded with emotions. At first, she didn't move, just held onto Bill's shoulders for support, staring into his deep dark eyes. Their breathing was heavy with just the contact of their bodies. Once she started moving there would be no time to look at each other like this.

"You're so beautiful." Bill whispered.

"You are." Sookie responded as she ran her hand over Bill's cheek. The sexual tension between them was mad crazy and someone was going to have to move soon. Then the tears started flowing for Sookie. The emotions of being with Bill just became too much. They weren't tears of sadness, just emotional release. Even though Bill knew that, emotion caught in his throat.

He brushed a tear from her cheek. "Don't cry baby…don't."

As he spoke he kissed her tears away, ending at her lips. He gave her gentle slow kisses, then more fervent and rough, coaxing her to a point where the need to move overtook all thoughts and reason. Sookie began to lift off him and plunge back down, over and over.

Bill matched her movements, thrusting upwards into her hot velvet walls; she fit him perfectly, every inch of him encased in her moist warmth. Her pace quickened and slowed according to the level of tension she wanted to build in him.

Sookie continued her movements over and over, making them both crazy with need. Bill could barely stand the pressure in his groin. He pressed his lips to the base of Sookie's neck, sucking, and finally biting to keep from screaming.

It hurt Sookie, but it was exquisite pain. She knew her blood was sustaining him. It felt like such a personal gift that only she could give him. She wanted Bill to mark her body, stake his claim, own her.

Sookie was so close to her climax, she could barely control the rhythm with which she bounced on Bill's hard member. Then, it started. As she thrust herself down on him repeatedly, her release washed over her in mind blowing waves of pleasure.

"Ahhh…Bill!" Sookie screamed.

Her tight walls milked Bill to his ultimate release. He moaned as his orgasm overtook him, sending pleasure coursing through him. He shot stream after stream inside her, never wanting to exit the warm cocoon of her body.

Neither of them moved, still experiencing the after shocks of their orgasms. Sookie just held tightly to Bill, and he laid his head on her shoulder and his arms encircled her waist.

"God, it's never been like this, for me…" Bill finally said. "I don't even…I want you constantly. I can't get enough of you…You're everything I need."

Sookie just squeezed him tighter.


End file.
